Sunday Excerpt

Due to a few computer issues, I can’t post excerpts of my current works in progress.  But, that doesn’t mean I won’t grace you with one this week.  No, you’re not that lucky.  /cue evil laugh  … ahem… I have several, much older works living on laptop.  Tonight’s excerpt is what was going to be my first novel but thanks to some uninspiring times with my ex and a huge case of writer’s block, it hasn’t moved beyond chapter ten.

The inspiration for this story came from the Hale-Bopp comet when it whizzed by us back in the mid nineties.  I thought why not write a book about a girl who had no idea where she came from and was drawn into a new world where magic existed.  The very idea echoed of a cartoon I used to watch and a couple of other novels I had read, but it was the first one I wanted to write.  It had a whole different beginning when I first started then when that copy disappeared, this one came into being for a more young adult flavor to the whole fantasy scene.

This excerpt is the beginning of that story I call Way of the Comet and the come in this story is the timer in which this girl has to figure out things and take her rightful place.  It is a rather cliché type story and the idea over done, but you never know how people may react to this version of the old time story.

There comes a time in everybody’s life when the world as you know it changes. This happened to me not so long ago. When my life changed, it changed….with a vengeance.

You see, I am now the queen of Sardohnia, a land I had never heard of, until the year my brother Kyle died. It was early spring. I had turned 16 a few months before. My father and I had just returned from my brother’s funeral when I decided to go to the pond that was on the back forty of the ranch we called home. I, and my horse Sunny, went there often. That day I had a strange feeling that something was going to happen. What I it was, I didn’t know.

When I finally got to the pond the feeling was still with me, but all I wanted to do was to sit under my favorite oak tree and think. All I thought about was my brother and how we used to play together by that pond. Every summer we would swim there and every winter we’d ice skate across it when the ice would be thick enough. Kyle and I used to fish from the spot I had chosen to sit. That’s what we were doing the day before he was run down.

That accident happened two weeks before, but to father and me, it felt like an eternity. Without my brother Kyle, I had thought, nothing would be the same around there ever again. I cannot begin to tell you just how true that was.

While I was thinking about all of that, someone came up behind me. I was startled from my thoughts by the rustling movements behind me as they pushed through the branches of the low shrugs growing wild by the old oak. At first I thought it was Sunny, or one of the other horses that my father owned, coming for a drink of water. Whenever I would be here by the pond, I would give them some sugar cubes. So I started to get up and dig in my pockets for them when a voice, a young woman’s voice,  came from behind me.

“Please. Don’t turn around. I need to know your name,” she said speaking softly as if she were trying to keep from being overheard.


Whoever she was, she had a soft sweet voice that didn’t evoke fear. Who was this person behind me? She wanted to know my name. Why?  I wouldn’t know. I was going to find out one or another. So I figured I would give her my nickname instead of my real name. Very few people called me by my real name.

“My name is Rana.” I replied and let the silence build waiting for her answer.

“Rana… No, you are not the one I am looking for,” she said, and then continued, “Maybe you can help me find her before I leave here. She lives somewhere in this area I have been told. Could you help me?”

“I might. Who is it you are seeking?”  I kept my eyes forward, looking across the pond at the horses grazing in the field and wondering about this person behind me.  Knowing she was looking for me had me on edge with curiosity.

“She is called Larana Auraner and her life is in great danger.”  The worried tone in her voice sent a shiver through me and I almost turned around to see who it was talking.

Danger? That sent off alarms in my head. Why would my life be in danger? I haven’t done anything to anyone, at least not that I know of. How did she know my real name?

“I might,” I had said hesitantly, “Why is she in danger?” then tries to turn my head slightly to look but made myself turn back before I so much as glimpsed her shadow.

She said. “Enemies of her family are out to end her blood line.”  The finality that tinged her voice made me stiffen.

We didn’t have any enemies that I knew of except maybe a rival breeder in the area. But why would they want to kill me or maybe my family. I just had to find out more before I said anything to her about finding who she was looking for.

I sat down once more with my back still to her, I replied, “Why would anyone want to kill this Larana person? She hasn’t done anything illegal has she?”

“No,” she said, “it has nothing to do with this world’s problems. She is to be Sardohnia’s new queen and enemies of the throne are going to kill her so that they can put someone else in her place. They mean to take over and put the rest of the kingdoms in chains or worse. She should be old enough to assume the throne about now… I hope.” I wasn’t sure but, to me, she sounded almost anxious about finding me.